Category: Prayer

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Reflections of Remembrance and Healing from Boston

An unbelievably short time ago, on Friday, April 12th, I and members of our Central Reform Temple family were completing our ten day pilgrimage and study mission in Israel.

On that day, we were in Jerusalem, as preparations for the weekly celebration of the Sabbath were unfolding. In a palpable sense of cessation and anticipation unique to that holy city, the arrival of Shabbat is viscerally felt. Beginning at noon, the usually bustling streets almost magically become quiet and deserted…the traffic on the highways disappears…storefronts are shuttered… and a quiet peace descends upon the city as the golden hues of the sun begin to fade, ushering in the sacred day of prayer and rest.

Our group of Bostonians had experienced a week of intense emotion and inspiration, mixed with clear, unvarnished confrontations with the complex challenges , the tensions and pressures, encompassed in this “City of Peace” that has seen so much conflict. And yet, in the midst of the renewed threats coming from rocket attacks from the Syrian border during our visit, we all felt safe and secure. We reached that final day of our stay filled with gratitude that the peace of the Sabbath had indeed embraced us throughout our week in Israel.

One week later…to the very hour…  at noon this past Friday, April 19th, the exact same scene of deserted streets and shuttered stores was replicated here in Boston. But this was not a sign of the arrival of the Sabbath peace.  It was the fearful and anxiety-filled unfolding of the final chapter of the tragedy that has engulfed all of us over the past few days. The dramatic irony was overwhelming for those of us who had just returned from 10 safe and peaceful days in the world’s most volatile and dangerous region – only to face terrorism here in our own city.

Even articulating these words, “terrorism in Boston”- seems surreal and unimaginable. At this moment, not even one week after the horror that changed all of our lives, it still seems impossible that all of this could have really happened…

And yet – it did happen – and the terrible reality is a gaping would in our minds and hearts. Once again, we have experienced a transforming “where were you when” moment in our lives – a day, a week that none of us will ever forget… and many of our neighbors will continue to painfully relive daily for the rest of their lives.

Coming together for a Service of Remembrance and Healing, in shared support and loving friendship, cannot but bring to mind the other times of national tragedy that we have endured together over the years. The emotions of the past few days have brought back so many echoes of Oklahoma City…of September 11th…of Newtown. And as with so many historic events of our rime, we all experienced the dramatic developments of this past week in real time – either at the very location of the tragedy, within a few short blocks of this very place… or glued to our television screens or computer monitors. It has been a week of powerful visual images that are seared into our consciousness. And it has also been an unending flow of words…the breathless updates of reporters… the commentary of pundits and experts… the truly inspiring and comforting messages of our local and national leaders.

We have heard the reflections of various religious representatives – some conventionally parochial and others genuinely moving, healing and prophetic, reaching out to embrace all of us…

And we have also been challenged and encouraged by the very powerful messages of our civic leaders- the dogged determination of Mayor Menino… the clear vision and strong leadership of Governor Patrick…and, once again, the rich imagery and soaring eloquence of President Obama. Their words of hope and confidence, their messages of compassion for the families of the dead and those who were  injured, their praise for the courage of the first responders and for the generosity of spirit that poured forth from the people of Boston, were all enormously helpful and healing for all of us. So much so, that perhaps too many more words, beyond those of prayer and song, may indeed be excessive and presumptuous at this time.

Just being able to come together…just having been able to leave our homes and arrive here safely… just being able to be together- after a harrowing week of fear and isolation –this is enough of a message for this moment… as are the emotions that cannot be expressed by the further multiplication of words and attempts at wisdom. The human stories of courage and selflessness that will continue to emerge will be the most eloquent sermons.  And so, I will not speak too many more words this morning. The wisdom has already been imparted… the stirring messages and challenges have already been spoken.

So let me share just a few impressions that remain in the forefront of my consciousness. I hope that they might reflect many of your own feelings and thoughts, and perhaps help you to process the deep emotions we have all been confronting over the past few days.

I am thinking of the tearful encounters with the Marathon runners I spoke with on Tuesday, right after the attack, when I and my fellow Back Bay clergy colleagues took to the streets to meet with and offer support for the throngs of shell-shocked visitors who were still out following the violent end of the race. I spoke with people from Minneapolis, Washington DC, and Utah. In the midst of their own trauma, each of them wanted to thank the people of this great and beautiful city. They vowed to return – both to visit and to run again.  And I could not help but think that perhaps the conventional, clichéd images of Boston – perpetuated by lurid Southie mobster movies and Saturday Night Live skits  might finally melt away… and once again we could reclaim our role as the “City on the Hill”… a place of learning and creativity… the cradle of liberty. Not only the home of the Red Socks, Celtics and Bruins, but the very essence of the ”Spirit of America.”

Another impression I come away with this week is of the countless messages that I- and I’m sure, each of you- received from so many friends and even distant acquaintances, from around the world. Emails, Facebook posts and phone calls, all expressing deep concern and sharing their sadness for what we were going through here in Boston. These genuine human connections were so helpful and encouraging for all of us- and I hope that such personal ties of sensitivity and support will remain one of the many positive things that may come out of this difficult time.

Another visual image that remains in my consciousness… as we were all sitting in front of our TV screens on Friday evening, breathlessly watching the drama of the capture in Watertown, I wonder if some of you may have also noticed something at once incongruous and yet so overwhelmingly powerful about the scene. In the midst of the wall of police vehicles and SWAT trucks, and the crowds of heavily armed troops converging on the street where the fugitive suspect was being apprehended, there stood- at the very center of the  television camera’s view – the most beautiful azalea tree and budding forsythia bushes…

I hope that it does not sound trite that in the unbearable anxiety of those moments, when a final suicide explosion could well have detonated and taken more lives before our very eyes – I felt the need to focus my attention on those beautiful signs of life…of calm…of the eternal hope of rebirth and renewal of this season. There was something about the brilliant colors of the pink and yellow blossoms, in the midst of the blazing police lights and the fearful events being played out before us, that somehow gave me hope that this nightmare would end…

And one final impression… later that Sabbath Eve, when the drama had concluded, I reflected once again back on the previous week, in Jerusalem. I felt deeply that Boston had also emerged as a Holy City. Prevented by the emergency from gathering with our congregation in worship that night, I closed my eyes and sensed that God had indeed been with us throughout this painful week.  The selfless courage, the boundless compassion, the determination and resilience, the shared prayers, were all signs of the Divine Presence in our midst.  Many surely questioned where God was in the brutal deaths of a smiling gap-toothed little boy and two lovely young women, who had come to be part of a time of happy gathering of our community. And we know that indeed, God was with us… in the pain and sorrow, and in the nobility of our collective response to the pain and sorrow.

The Boston Globe columnist, Juliette Kayyem, in an insightful reflection a few days ago on the challenge we now face to carry on and move forward, began her essay with a surprising and obscure quote from- of all people- my old Seminary professor, Rabbi Stanley Chyet. I have no idea where she found this passage, which I had never heard. Having known him well- as both a Jewish historian and a gifted poet, I was so moved by this unexpected encounter with the memory of my old friend and teacher. These words offer us a fitting message as we resolve to begin the healing of our beloved city…

We ought not pray for what we have never known:

Unbroken peace…unmixed blessing…

No.

Better to pray for the will to see and touch…

The power to do good…and to make new.

 

To which we say… Amen!

Rabbi Howard Berman A. Berman is Founding Rabbi of Central Reform Temple, two blocks from the bomb site. He is also Rabbi Emeritus of Chicago Sinai Congregation, and the Executive Director of the Society for Classical Reform Judaism.  These words are adapted from a sermon delivered after the tragedy in Boston.  

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Machzor Blog: What’s in a Name?

L’chol Machzor, yesh shem…

MHaNefesh webWe finally have a name to call our new Machzor!  Mishkan HaNefesh.  As we turn each year to our prayerbook for the High Holy Days, we want to ensure the name would and could reflect not only its contents but the experience of these days as well.

The title of our Shabbat, Weekly, and Festival Prayerbook, Mishkan T’fila led the way.  The choice, years ago, of “mishkan” captured the desire to move beyond the “gates” into the sanctuary, the inner circle of prayer.  It gave access to the many voices and layers of the liturgical experience and reminded us of the centrality of the communal experience within sacred space, even when that space is a prayer book.

Yet, as we have learned, the prayer book itself cannot guarantee the efficacy of prayer or any worship.  It will take the individual within the context of the community to find meaning and value.  Thus, when what name should be linked with mishkan arose, the idea of hanefesh which connects to one’s inner life and what we call a human being became a fitting complement.

The Editorial Core Group made up of the editors:  Rabbis Eddie Goldberg, Shelly and Janet Marder, and Leon Morris; along with our Cantorial colleague, Evan Kent, as well as Hara Person, Peter Berg and me; unanimously supported by the CCAR Board, sought to capture what these Days of Awe seek:  t’shuvah, celebration, renewal, personal challenge and reflection, reaffirmation of communal connection to the Jewish story, among others.

As the introduction to our High Holiday Prayer Book notes: “We hope that this Machzor will be a “place” where the spiritual lives of individuals and the religious framework of the community meet….The focus of the Days of Awe is the inner life, each person’s sacred core—the divine essence breathed into us, which the Bible calls nefesh (Genesis 2:7).  Jewish tradition gives us tools for helping the nefesh (soul) grow and improve: t’shuvah (repentance) and the work of cheshbon hanefesh (accounting/taking stock of the soul).  Our Machzor guides and celebrates this personal journey of transformation and renewal…” while it also recognizes the profound significance of the communal experience.

It is our desire that within every community and congregation, each nefesh can find him or herself within this Machzor just as we hope this particular Machzor, Mishkan HaNefesh, will be found within our community and congregations as a means to give voice to our heartfelt aspirations and sacred work we engage in throughout the holiday season.

Rabbi Elaine Zecher is at Temple Israel in Boston, MA, and is the Chair of the Machzor Advisory Group.

Learn more about the new CCAR Machzor.  For more information about participating in piloting, email machzor@ccarnet.org.

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Coming Together in Times of Crisis

As we all try and process the horrors of the Boston marathon bombing, we must remember to stop and appreciate the good works that often gets overshadowed by the seemingly endless parade of horrible we read about each day.

Volunteers removing the flooring at West End Temple after Superstorm Sandy.
Volunteers removing the flooring at West End Temple after Superstorm Sandy.

Almost six months ago almost the entire east coast was rocked by Superstorm Sandy.  While many of us have picked up and moved on, two New York-area congregations, Temple Sinai in Massapequa and West End Temple in Neponsit, are still picking up the pieces.  Like many coastal-area homes and businesses, the synagogues suffered severe storm damage which included extreme flooding and loss of property.

We are proud to announce that the CCAR has donated over 400 new copies of Mishkan T’filah, the Reform Movement prayerbook, to the synagogues to help them to continue to move forward in their rebuilding process.

“We were heartbroken when we saw how the storm had ravaged these synagogues and uprooted the lives of people in their communities,” said Rabbi Steven A. Fox, Chief Executive of the CCAR. “We donated these prayerbooks to help individuals and congregations heal.”  He continued “As creators and publishers of Mishkan T’filah, we understand the important and powerful role that prayer can play in bringing a community together and allowing them to feel whole again.”

Colleagues helping colleagues - Rabbi Margie Slome surrounded by, l to r, Rabbi Hara Person, Rabbi Amy Ehrlich, Cantorial Intern Amanda WInter, and Rabbi Steve Fox.
Colleagues helping colleagues – Rabbi Margie Slome surrounded by, l to r, Rabbi Hara Person, Rabbi Amy Ehrlich, Cantorial Intern Amanda WInter, and Rabbi Steve Fox.

Rabbi Marjorie Slome of West End Temple was thrilled to receive the new prayerbooks, as extreme flooding destroyed her synagogue’s entire library. “We are so grateful for the CCAR’s generous support and donation to our temple,” said Rabbi Slome. “Receiving these books is truly a blessing as we rebuild.”

The CCAR facilitated the donation of the prayerbooks with funds donated by Rabbi Jonathan Stein, Immediate Past President of the CCAR and Senior Rabbi at Shaaray Tefila in Manhattan.

For Rabbi Stein, supporting these synagogues in their time of need was a given. “When I heard about the storm’s destruction; it was almost a visceral response,” he said. “I instantly committed myself to make this gift happen.” He continued “This is the kind of thing we do for each other in times of crisis.”

“During the aftermath of Superstorm Sandy, as we at Temple Sinai reached out for help and there were many who embraced our wet hands.  As our community helped us we helped our community.  It is was not easy for us to say: “We need help”.  But, we soon learned that there are two sides to tzedakah – to give and to receive, both with dignity and humility.  Temple Sinai has been blessed to receive help/tzedakah from individuals, synagogues, and non-profits near and far.  One such is the CCAR.  With the CCAR’s contribution of Mishkan Tefila (prayerbooks) a renewed sense of worship has been given to us.  Knowing that the CCAR responded to our need, our members have a sense of connectedness which never before existed.  We are eternally grateful to the CCAR for their contribution,” said Rabbi Janise Poticha of Temple Sinai.

Flooding at Temple Sinai after Superstorm Sandy.
Flooding at Temple Sinai after Superstorm Sandy.

The CCAR’s donation is just one of the many ways that the Reform Jewish community has come together to support one another in times of need.  In the days and weeks after the storm, CCAR member rabbis, who serve both congregations and community organizations, galvanized their memberships to provide on-the-ground support and supplies to those in some of the hardest hit areas. The Union for Reform Judaism and the Religious Action Center of Reform Judaism have also played a leading role in the Jewish response to Sandy, including raising more than $750,000 for disaster relief efforts and coordinating donations of essential supplies to synagogues, community centers and families.

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Machzor Blog: Controversy For the Sake of Heaven

IMG_3949What do you we think people should want to hear rabbis speak about on Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur?  Do they want to be comforted and soothed – reminded of the power of hope, the possibility of happiness or finding the means to peace? Or do they wish to be aroused and challenged by the brokenness in the world, the myriad needs of the Jewish community and the wrongdoing in their lives?

 The insight of one of my teachers in rabbinic school was that a rabbi’s job is to “comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable.”  Most people I’ve met are fine with the first half of the dictum, but every year I hear from people who don’t want to come to services to be disturbed.  It reminds me of a joke about a new rabbi who sought advice from the synagogue Board about what she should talk about for her first High Holy Days.

 The president said, “Talk about something to do with being Jewish.”

“Great,” the rabbi replied, “I’ll talk about Shabbat.”

“Maybe not,” one Board member offered, “A lot of our members don’t observe Shabbat. They might take offense.”

“How about talking about Israel?” the rabbi offered.

 “What?!”, said several on the Board, “Do you want to create controversy the first time you speak? We have people here with such different ideas about Israel.”

“All right, I’ll talk about why people should study Torah more for themselves, not just send their children to Religious school,” said the rabbi.

“I don’t know,” some trustees said, “Why make people feel bad about what they don’t do.”

“In that case, what should I talk about?”

“Rabbi, just talk about being Jewish.”

IMG_4029Each person has different yearnings and needs for what they seek during the Days of Awe. Every one of us seeks both comfort and challenge, to be put at ease and goaded to action.  It is likely that at some point on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur you will hear a prayer, music or teaching you do not like, troubles you or challenges what you believe.  Instead of lashing out against those who offer a different point of view, use the strong feelings you have as a motivation for further reflection, conversation and respectful debate.

You do not need a rabbi or prayer to provoke you. Indeed, this is a time when our souls should be stirred. The weeks before and during the Days of Awe are a time for deep, inner, spiritual reflection. Honest self-appraisal (חשבון הנפש) cannot help but confront us with challenging questions. Have I been honest about my faults? Have done all I could for others?  Am I the man or woman I want to be? Is the person others see truly the person I am? What do I hide from others – and why?  Indeed, if you come to the synagogue expecting to be moved, but take no time before or during services for true self-reflection, the point of these days will be lost.  The goal is not to feel that we are bad. Rather, the purpose of these days is to become the best we can be and to seek a world that ought to be.

The Days of Awe, then, are inherently meant to trouble and disturb, to uproot and challenge. This is not, however, controversy for its own sake, but for the sake of Heaven. Such debate, our sages teach, will endure (Pirkei Avot 5:17).  May it be a time of good and blessing, but also one that forces us all to face the hard truths and unmet needs of our lives, our families, our people and the world. 

Rabbi Irwin A. Zeplowitz serves the Community Synagogue in Port Washington, NY.

Learn more about the new CCAR Machzor.  For more information about participating in piloting, email machzor@ccarnet.org.

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Women of the Wall: The Sharansky Proposal

There are times when it seems that something fundamental might, just might, be shifting.  That’s how I felt following a discussion in which Rabbi Steve Fox and I represented the Reform Movement (for the CCAR), together with Rick Jacobs (for the URJ) and Jack Luxemberg ( for ARZA) , in a meeting with Natan Sharansky of the Jewish Agency, about his proposed solution to issues presented by the Women of the Wall. While an obligation of confidentiality limits what can be shared publically about that discussion, it has been widely reported that Sharansky envisions “one Western Wall for one Jewish People.” This would involve expanding the plaza leading to the Kotel and creating an area for egalitarian/pluralistic prayer to the right of the ramp to the Temple Mount. It would be equal in size and elevation to the existing prayer areas, with one access point to the plaza. Those seeking to approach the Kotel would choose between the gender-segregated and the egalitarian/pluralistic areas, with equal physical access to both. The latter zone would be supervised by the Jewish Agency, which is to say, a pluralistic body, not the present, Orthodox-dominated Kotel Foundation.

600228_10151500068330673_1867844465_nThis not an optimal solution, which would require full and equal access to the entire plaza and the Kotel itself and transferring authority over the entire zone to a pluralistic, broadly representative body. We must not forget that the Kotel area is both a religiously important site and the venue of major national gatherings. Whereas its present character is alienating for many Israelis and other Jews, it could and should become a source of unity for all Israelis, whether they consider themselves religious or secular, and the entire Jewish People.

Clearly, the Sharansky proposal falls short of that ultimate goal. Nonetheless, we cannot allow the perfect to be the enemy of the good. The essence of this compromise has elicited a very positive reaction by Anat Hoffman, chair of Women of the Wall and a courageous leader of Progressive Judaism in Israel, and the NY Times reported that Schmuel Rabinowitz, the ultra-Orthodox rabbi of the Western Wall, has declared he will not oppose it. Israeli President Shimon Peres deserves praise for interceding with Rabinowitz to press for moderation and for Peres’ public support for Jewish pluralism.

A host of critically important details remain to be resolved and major questions must be answered. How much will this cost? Who will pay for it? How long will it take? How will the governance of the larger area be addressed? What happens in the interim? And what is Plan B, if this ambitious proposal cannot be implemented? Will a third section be carved out, geographically or temporally, within the existing prayer zone to allow for pluralistic/egalitarian prayer?

One thing is clear. The role of the Israeli police needs to change completely and immediately. Heretofore, the police have been an instrumentality of ultra-Orthodox intolerance and oppression, threatening and arresting women for wearing a tallit or praying aloud near the Kotel. This is intolerable. Just this morning, Israeli police arrested five women for wearing tallitot at the Kotel. Remarkably, the judge before whom they were arraigned ruled that the women did not disturb the peace. Rather, she held, those who sought to interfere with their observance of Rosh Chodesh were the provocateurs. The obligation of law enforcement is to protect everyone who seeks to pray at the Kotel from harassment or assault. This was a point I emphasized strongly in the discussion, one that I consider central to both the interim period and the long term.

I also raised the question of whether this is a “separate but equal” approach to the problem. “Separate but equal,” in the context of American law, was repudiated by the US Supreme Court in 1954, in Brown vs. Board of Education, which proclaimed that separate was inherently unequal. Sharansky responded that his proposal differs fundamentally from the American situation, where the intention of the invalidated laws was to segregate the races. Here, he argued, the intent is not to segregate, but to create the opportunity for all Jews to worship at the Kotel according to their own beliefs and practices.

IMG_4021I believe that argument has merit. When Jewish sovereignty over the Kotel was regained in 1967, the entire Kotel, from the present prayer area down to the Southwest corner, was recognized, including by Orthodox leaders, as one sacred precinct. The proposal is an opportunity for us, too, to affirm that view. But while expressing support for the approach in this situation, subject to an acceptable resolution of the details, I cautioned that it should not be seen as a precedent or paradigm for resolving other issues in Israeli society, such as ultra-Orthodox attempts to impose gender segregation on public buses and occasions.

A host of potential obstacles and possible opponents stand in the way of implementing this proposal: some Orthodox and ultra-Orthodox, Israeli archeologists, the Islamic Waqf, which manages the Temple Mount, Jordan, which sees itself as custodian of that precinct, or international bodies. Nonetheless, the proposal is historic. For the first time, the government of Israel seems ready to recognize that it is accountable to all the religious streams of the Jewish People and to make a major financial and political commitment to fulfill that accountability. This represents a dramatic and historic step forward.

This promising development is only the beginning of the process, not its culmination. In the weeks and months to come, as details of the program are clarified and questions are answered, as opposing views are addressed and hopefully, overcome, I believe that we, as individual rabbis and as the CCAR, the rabbinic leadership arm of Reform Judaism, need to do three things: work to ensure a satisfactory resolution of the details of the proposal, rally support for the proposal, and step up our advocacy on the larger issues of justice in Israeli society that the Women of the Wall situation symbolizes.

Rabbi Rick Block is Senior Rabbi of The Temple – Tifereth Israel in Cleveland, Ohio, and President of the Central Conference of American Rabbis.  

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Machzor Blog: The Holy Days? Yup, It’s Time…

CloudsOur congregants usually know a good bit about the link between a Pesach Seder and freedom, that to be in a sukkah is to celebrate the beauty and fragility of our lives in nature, and that we honor bravery and frivolity on Purim, dedication and faith on Chanukah.  When asked about the High Holy Days, most know to focus on what it means to begin again with a New Year, to pray for the future of our world and community, and to do soul searching work in our strivings to try again to hit the mark.

Why is it that on these Holy Days our synagogues are full to overflowing – do they come just to observe the New Year and repent in public?  It is true; they gain strength in connection to one another and find comfort in doing the sacred work with others. I know that many of us lead great worship – but that can’t be the reason so many show up.  The cynic in me could say it’s because they’re “supposed to.”  But I have to believe that some are coming because they are searching for God. 

What kind of God, I don’t know – and perhaps they don’t know either.  But if they might not always articulate it, during the Holy Days our people are looking for a deeper understanding of God.  Our liturgy is certainly focused precisely on God – more so than the other holidays we celebrate; prayer after prayer, kavanah after kavanah, vidui after vidui.  Many of my congregants will tell me that they don’t believe, or that they believe in something more general and of the “spirit” — still they come and sit through hours of recitation, song, and sermon – all of which are focused on God.

What does this mean for us cantors and rabbis?  We often get so caught up in the choreography and the theatre, the seamless cues and flawless singing, the profound yet intimate sermons and reflective iyunim – that we forget that our congregants need tools to find their way to the Divine.  Do we as clergy focus enough on the challenges and opportunities we all have with the God of this liturgy?  Do we give our congregants the tools to dig deep into the realm of belief and faith?

They come to us with questions, even if not openly articulated: If God created this world, on this New Year, why is it so broken?  If God asked Abraham to sacrifice his beloved one, is the pain that I experience in life to be considered a sacrifice as well?  How can I be written into the Book of Life if I do not “believe” in the way I think I’m supposed to believe?  

We, as clergy, always find the timing of the Holy Days difficult (but they’re always right on time) – perhaps our frustration is also with the fact that we don’t have ample time to teach about these Days, to dig deep, to study the rituals and texts, to examine Un’taneh Tokef and B’rosh haShanah yikateivun – how can we live with such a powerful God, and still hear the kol d’ma’ma daka? 

IMG_2568The High Holy Days get lost in the shuffle of summer’s transition into fall.  We should use them as an opportunity to directly engage in a conversation about God, and the new machzor may be the tool with which we can initiate these conversations with our congregations: Conversations about belief, faith, and the different pathways to, and expressions of God in our lives. 

A few years ago Rabbi Rachel Cowan spoke to the Commission for Worship, Music and Religious Living, and reflected on the fact that many congregants don’t feel comfortable talking about God – they assume we, their clergy, have the God thing all figured out and therefore are embarrassed that they don’t and don’t know how to ask us.  Maybe now is the time to begin these conversations using the unique texts of our Machzor as our guide and facilitator.  Let’s begin again.

Cantor Rosalie Boxt is the cantor of DC-area Temple Emanuel in Kensington, Maryland, is the Director of Worship for the 2013 URJ Biennial, serves as a member of the URJ Adjunct Faculty and is on the faculty of Hava Nashira.  She is a past vice-president of the ACC, and serves on the Executive Committee of the URJ Kutz Camp.

Learn more about the new CCAR Machzor.  For more information about participating in piloting, email machzor@ccarnet.org.

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Machzor Blog: Waiting All Day for Yizkor

imagesThe hour of the day is late, but the seats in my congregation on Yom Kippur are full.  It is time for Yizkor, and despite the exhaustion and hunger draining us all, everyone is all here.  Many have been waiting all day – some, all year – just for this moment.

When I was a newly ordained rabbi, I had a hard time understanding Yizkor.  I had not experienced death or loss as an adult, thank God, and the power of Yizkor was a mystery to me.  I tried putting on the airs of a knowing wise rabbi, tried to put on my best well-modulated rabbinic voice as I conducted the service, but, honestly, Yizkor was an awkward hour for me.  Today, I can’t say I have any great chochmah about the mysteries of death and mourning much more now, but 15 years later, I do know some of my own losses.  I have sat with many more grieving people, held their loss with them, and shared their pain.  And as I grow older myself, I see the arc of my own life and, more and more, can project how, one day, it will reach its conclusion.  Like the rest of Yom Kippur, Yizkor is our ritual to help us confront our true doubts and fears about life.  As much as ever, we need our Machzor to be an effective tool to help us shape a meaningful Yizkor.

The poetry and readings of Yizkor in the old Gates of Repentance have taught me a great deal.   Their words echo in my mind throughout the year: “Scarcely ushered into life, we begin our journey to the grave…”  “If some messenger were to come to us with the offer that death should be overthrown, but with the condition that birth should also cease…”  “In the rising of the sun and in its going down…”  Gates of Repentance did set the stage for my generation of rabbis by teaching us what Yizkor could mean, how it could affect our lives.

And yet, updates are needed for the new machzor.  The Yizkor of Gates of Repentance (GoR) is crammed too full with words, at least for me.  It feels at times like a dry desert of words, when we need a spiritual pool to immerse in.  It still dwells too much on the martyrdom of the Holocaust, especially at its climactic moments.  The Psalms traditionally found in Yizkor are treated more like obligations than opportunities.  But music is critically important to the power of Yizkor.  The occasions for music in the GoR are almost all from the Classical, composed set, and very formal.   Elegant though they are, I believe today’s congregations appreciate more contemporary music, or music that is paired-down, even at Yizkor, and it would be helpful to have texts that facilitate this kind of music.  I fell in love with the Carlebach “HaNeshamah Lach” in GoR (page 485), and I thirst for more musical opportunities like this in the new Mishkan HaNefesh (the new machzor).  We might even ask:  Can the pages of a machzor encourage the use of niggunim?

IMG_4107Another note: The 23rd Psalm presents its own challenges, because the King James language is so well-known and beloved, but gendered, and the more modern gender-neutral versions are so clumsy (including, in my opinion, the recent attempts by the CCAR).   Leading a recent shiva minyan from Mishkan T’filah for a House of Mourning, I encountered quizzical looks and puzzled faces when we reached the new translation of the 23rd Psalm; the spell of the moment was broken by its awkwardness.  (“Where did ‘the valley of the Shadow of Death’ go?” one person wondered, let down by the new language.)

But the best words I speak on Yom Kippur are at Yizkor when I am simply silent, and just sit down.  A few years ago, I found instructions for a guided meditation at Yizkor that invites the congregation to re-experience their lost ones again, asking them to hear their voices, feel their touch, imagine the words they would share were they to encounter them once again.  We need the white space on the page to offer this experience at Yizkor.  More important than the words of prayer, the Machzor can facilitate our true experience of prayer.

Grief is very often accompanied by intense loneliness.  Sometimes on Yizkor I think the members of our congregations experience it in isolation, even in a crowded Sanctuary.  Our Conservative colleague Rabbi Harold Kushner writes that “the primary message of the twenty-third Psalm is not that bad things will not happen to us.  It is that we will never have to face those bad things alone, ‘for Thou art with me.’”  Although each person’s loss is personal and unique, often beyond expression, if the new Machzor could somehow build bridges among us all during Yizkor, and if it could help us feel that indeed we are not all alone, we would all be stronger.

Rabbi Andy Vogel is the rabbi at Temple Sinai in Brookline, MA, a 300-family congregation.  He was ordained at HUC-JIR in New York in 1998, and is a member of the Machzor poetry committee.

Learn more about the new CCAR Machzor.  For more information about participating in piloting, email machzor@ccarnet.org.

Categories
General CCAR News Prayer Rabbis Reform Judaism

I Am the Glass: A Reading for Yom HaShoah

Unknown-1I am the glass

Once clear, smooth, perfect.
Protecting the store, the home,
the eyes.

I am the glass.
Shattered now, broken, sharp,
dangerous.

I am the book.
Once a source of peoplehood,
philosophy and learning.
Inspiring the spirit, the mind,
the person.

I am the book.
Burning now in a flame of hate.
A precursor to the fate of a
community.

I am the synagogue.
Once the house of learning,
the house of prayer, the house of
gathering.

I am the synagogue.
Aflame now, the end of
an era of safety in Europe.

I am the rabbi.
Once a teacher, a leader,
a dignified transmitter of Torah.

I am the rabbi.
Humiliated now on the streets
of Germany.

Forced to choose between
desecrating the Torah
and surviving the night.

I am the child.
Once carefree and innocent,
Laughing, playing, free.

I am the child.
Terrified now as they take
my father away
Shaken by an evil in this night.

I am the glass.
Repaired now by a People
that will never give in.
A window into a future of hope,
of goodness and peace.

I am the glass.

Rabbi Karen Bender is at Temple Judea in Tarzana, CA.

 

Categories
General CCAR Passover Pesach Prayer Rabbis Reform Judaism

A Real Passover Journey: The Road to Marriage Equality

Rabbi Denise Eger speaking at the rally in Washington, DC.
Rabbi Denise Eger speaking at the rally in Washington, DC.

I just returned from three days in Washington, D.C. to celebrate the beginning of Passover and an important crossroads on the road to freedom for the LGBT community.  The first two days of Passover were momentous because this year’s story outlined in the Haggadah was more personal than ever before.   The Haggadah reminds us to imagine that we went forth out of Egypt ourselves. As I stood on the steps of the Supreme Court on Tuesday and Wednesday mornings, the first two mornings of Passover, surrounded many dressed in red  worn for LGBT equality, I knew I was marching out of Egypt.

This year the Supreme Court of the United States heard two important cases about the freedom to marry for gay men and lesbians in our country. On the first morning of Passover, California’s Prop 8 case was heard. This case concerns whether or not Proposition 8 that was passed in November 2008 is legal. In other words, can a majority of voters take away rights from a minority!  Marriage equality was legal in California from June 2008 until the proposition passed in November 2008.  More than 18,000 couples married during that time.  I had the privilege of performing the first marriage in Los Angeles County.

On Wednesday the Court heard Windsor v the United States.  Edie Windsor sued the US for not recognizing her marriage to Thea Speyer. Upon Thea’s death Edie had to pay $363,000 of federal estate tax because the Defense of Marriage Act or DOMA would not recognize her as the legal spouse. Edie knew this was an injustice and wanted to do something about it. She and her partner of over 40 years were married in Canada but the federal government did not recognize their marriage when Thea died.

Our Reform movement has long been an advocate for equal rights for the LGBT community.  The first resolution of support came in 1964 by the then National Federation of Sisterhoods now Women of Reform Judaism, who called for the decriminalization of consensual sexual relations between adults!  In 1984 our then UAHC in a biennial resolution called for federal recognition of domestic partnerships for gay and lesbian couples and equal federal benefits to marriage! And our own CCAR endorsed civil marriage for gay men and lesbians early on in the marriage equality movement in 1996!

But on Tuesday morning as I prepared to speak at the rally on the day the California Prop 8 case was being heard I could feel the wheels of history literally turning.  You could feel it in the young people who turned out to support marriage equality. You could feel it in the older lesbian couples who flew in from Ohio just to be there.  You could feel in the gay dads schlepping their two young children to meet other families just like theirs!  Even when the opposition marched toward the several thousand gathered to support marriage equality-the opposition didn’t stay long.  The National Organization for Marriage and the Catholic Church bused in lots of Catholic high school students to march against marriage equality, many of whom were told they had to go or lose class credit! But the opposition marched toward us and was peaceably turned around by pro-marriage equality activists and the Capitol police. They marched back to their gathering place chanting, “One man, One Woman-only That’s what the Bible says!” I guess they haven’t read the story of Jacob, Leah, Rachel, Bilhah and Zilpah!

908758_10151519110782487_2128985697_nAs I took the podium to speak, I looked out on a sea of American flags and rainbow flags and people adorned in red it gave new meaning to the Red Sea! The crowd was so diverse, every race and ethnic group seemed present.  The signs people held aloft –included children of gay and lesbian parents who had homemade signs that proclaimed “Let my moms get married.”  One of my favorites was “Bigotry is not very Christian.”  Other couples had signs proclaiming how long they have been together 7 years-to 40 years to two older gentleman clearly in their 80’s who had been together nearly 60 years. It was very inspiring to be with Americans of every stripe who simply wanted their rights and responsibilities to care for their spouses.   I met a couple one in a wheelchair who had been the first to marry in the West Point Chapel.  Of course one was Jewish!

The scene outside as I spoke was different than the highly structured form and format of a Supreme Court hearing.  Even as some of the conservative justices wondered aloud if our country was ready for marriage equality, calling “it an experiment that hasn’t been around as long as the internet” it was clear from the number of years many of the couples has been together that gay “marriage” has been around forever. What hasn’t been around is the legal recognition and the protections embedded in the legal definition of marriage.

As I spoke about the Passover story and the themes of the holiday from degradation to dignity, from oppression to freedom the crowd understood that it was their story too.  Nine justices were deciding at the very moment and all were wondering if their hearts would be hardened to the arguments or whether finally LGBT couples who wish to marry will be able to do so.  In June we will find out how the Court will rule. So I am counting the days along with counting the omer.

Tuesday evening I had the privilege of co-leading a Prop 8 Passover Seder at the Equality Center at the Human Rights Campaign building. Formerly the B’nai Brith headquarters it was a poetic spatial affirmation between the Jewish commitment to tikkun olam that used to take place in those very rooms and the continuing work for equality and justice that is done now in the same space! The Passover Seder was organized by a former Religious Action Center Legislative Assistant, Joanna Blotner who now works for the Religious Coalition for Reproductive Rights.  Joanna grew up in our movement. She worked at HRC for several years after her time at the RAC. She is a straight ally. But she and a group of friends organized an amazing Seder with an inspiring Haggadah dedicated to equality for LGBT people and intertwined with the story of our Exodus from slavery!   More than 115 primarily young people in their 20’s and 30’s celebrated Passover together and talked about the meaning of equality, the meaning of liberty and the meaning of tikkun olam in the context of the Passover story.  I don’t know whether I was more moved by leading the Seder or being with these inspiring young leaders like Joanna!

There is no stopping now.  Whatever way the court rules (and pundits are having a field day trying to figure out from the questions how they will decide) the arc of justice is bending rapidly.  Just see the cover of the recent Time magazine. Watch the push for marriage equality in places like Minnesota, Rhode Island and Illinois.

And yet there are plenty of places where the LGBT community faced continued bigotry in the form of legislation. You can still be fired in 33 states in the United States for simply being gay. And in Arizona there is a terribly hateful “bathroom bill” aimed at transgender people.  And of course young people are still being bullied for perceived sexual orientation on school yards everywhere.

I have hope. This Passover gave me hope that we are on our way to the Promised Land. I have hope that the court will restore marriage equality in California. I have hope that DOMA will be declared unconstitutional. I have hope that the march to full equality is in full swing.  And I hope you all will actively work toward these freedoms in your community and work to actively help your young people learn how they can make a difference too.

Rabbi Denise L. Eger is the founding rabbi of Congregation Kol Ami, West Hollywood’s Reform Synagogue. She is currently President Elect of the CCAR.

Categories
Passover Pesach Prayer Rabbis Reform Judaism

A Prayer for Pesach 5773/2013

Israel beachWhat’s it going to take to make the waters part?

That’s a good question to ask tonight, beyond the other four.

The waters of complacency, of ignorance and fear

The waters of intransigence, of bigotry and rage

The waters of hostility, of hopelessness and war

These waters divide one shore from the other:

Israelis from Palestinians

Red States from Blue States

Privileged from Impoverished

Gun lovers from gun haters

Jew from Christian from Muslim

Nation from nation and race from race

What’s it going to take to make the waters part?

The waters that keep us from moving forward

The waters that drown dialogue in demonization

The waters that say, “We resign ourselves to the status quo”

These waters are strong enough to swallow an army.

Will it take a Moses with his staff outstretched?

A miracle? A plague?

A prayer, incantation, silent wish?

Petitioning the waves?

Only this:

People united in their faith that change will come when we truly want it.

People unbending in their demand that peace will come when we are ready to will it.

People willing to enter the sea and with God’s help, to make the waters move.

This is what our Pesach means and this is why we pray.

God, strengthen our steps to do more than dip a tentative toe in the water.

Engage our hearts, our soul and might,

And let Your light shine the way.

 Rabbi Jonathan Blake is the Senior Rabbi of Westchester Reform Temple in Scarsdale, New York